The Leftovers
by Cylinse
Summary: One day, everyone grew up. Too bad she didn't get the memo. Neji/Saku
1. One

**The Leftovers**

"_You know, they say that Rome wasn't built in a day."_

**I.**

If there was one question she hated above all others, it was the classic, "Why doesn't a pretty girl like you have a boyfriend yet?" It was a friendly inquiry, harmless, and she couldn't fault her askers. She'd asked herself the same question, too, when she was younger. This didn't stop her from snapping, "Who needs a boyfriend?"

It didn't bother her, being single. It really didn't. Just… when she held an invitation to a wedding in one hand and an invitation to a baby shower in the other, she felt terribly, horribly behind all her friends. And old.

And sometimes, secretly, when no one was looking (though she'd deny it violently), she felt rather lonely, too. That feeling was the worst by far.

Too bad it was too late now. She'd broken too many hearts, burned too many bridges, to turn around and ask one-time possibilities for a second chance. Hell, Naruto was married _**three years**_ now, and Rock Lee was about to be, a fact she found both disturbing on multiple levels and deeply saddening at the same time. She'd always figured that if all else failed, she could count on Lee to be waiting. As a girl, she'd taken him for granted. She'd taken all of them for granted. Now she just wished she'd given it a try.

God, she felt old. She had friends popping out babies, friends who'd been at it for years. Tomorrow was little Hikari's second (_**second!!**_) birthday. It felt surreal. It _**was**_ surreal. Where had the years gone? Somehow, she'd gone to sleep one morning and woken up in another time, with only a few vivid snippets here and there to prove she wasn't a twelve year old genin any longer.

When she started thinking these thoughts, she was at least wise enough now to realize that she was Moping, and Moping was unacceptable. She also knew from experience that the best cure was a couple of drinks at the filthiest little hole-in-the-wall establishment known to ninja-kind.

It had no name she knew of. It simply was. When one said one wanted a drink, it was implied that this was the place one was speaking of. When one said one wanted to go "out" without anything more descriptive, it was assumed that this place was the destination. It was also conveniently located about two blocks away from her apartment complex (though it was much, much further when stumbling back after closing. _**That**_ had been a long night).

It had been months since she'd last been, though back before everyone had gone off and grown up on her, they'd gone almost every night. The beginning of the end had been that night when the first couple announced their engagement. Now everyone was too busy with missions that didn't exist, or planning weddings that weren't for months and months, or "But I can't drink alcohol when I'm pregnant!" when she knew for a fact that the parties in question were not with child. She was a medic, after all.

By now she was well on her way to the bar, out the front door and down a side street affectionately dubbed "rape alley" that she just might not have taken had she not been a fully-trained ninja.

Out on a main road again, and then a left and a right and now she faced a nondescript green door set in a weathered brick building. The sign above said door was so worn out it was completely illegible. It could have used replacing.

The lighting inside was dingy, probably so that patrons couldn't see how dirty the place really was. It didn't help that the peeling walls were painted an ugly shade of yellow. She didn't mind the squalor; she'd just be careful to not bring her fingers to her mouth or touch the mixed nuts.

Naruto had eaten a whole bowl of them once on a dare. He'd regretted it when he found himself unable to stray too far from a restroom for a week. Apparently, the kyuubi's regenerative abilities didn't help when it came to food poisoning. She grinned. Sure, she'd fretted over him while he was ill, but the minute he was recovered enough for a mission, her first words were along the lines of, "I told you so!"

She sat down at what had been the usual table after ordering herself, "the strongest drink you've got." After a sip, she set it down, contorting her face into a knot. It tasted awful. A few moments later, to make sure that she'd actually been right about the atrocious flavor, she sipped it again, and then again, to triple check. It wasn't long before she realized she was sipping on air, so she got another.

At times, she wondered if there'd been an intangible signal announcing that the time to move on was now, and if so, why she hadn't gotten the memo. She also found herself wondering if Kakashi had felt the same way when his friends had started families of their own. At least he'd always have his "eternal rival."

Not quite ready for her next drink yet, she sighed and retreated into her own world again. She was still there, lazily drifting among her thoughts as she sipped on her drink when a dark figure sat down next to her and said, "Can you believe that Lee's getting married?"

She looked at her companion, startled. At first, she saw black hair, dark clothes, and mistook him for someone else, her heart racing, but then his features shifted into those of one Neji Hyuuga. "I hadn't expected to see anyone here," she said.

"Me neither," he said amicably and raised his glass. "A toast to company!" She grinned and humored him, grimacing when she forgot the atrocity in her glass and took too big a sip by mistake. He was talkative tonight. He'd probably already had quite a few drinks.

While Neji had never really been a part of her circle of friends, he'd spend time with them on rare occasions, and on very rare occasions he'd have a drink too many and become a decent human being. Tonight was apparently such an occasion.

He confirmed this when he grabbed her by the shoulders and pulled her too close, whispering in her ear, "That guy over there's checking you out." He wasn't quite slurring yet, but very close.

"How flattering," she said jokingly. "He'd a bit young for me, though. Isn't he one of Shikamaru's new genin?"

Neji examined him closely before looking thoughtful. "I don't think so," he said. "That would make him about…" he counted on his fingers, "twelve."

"You're right," she agreed. "He's a solid fourteen, at least."

He laughed. She hadn't thought her joke was _**that**_ funny. Clearly, Neji suggested, she'd not yet had enough to drink.

She went to take another sip of her drink only to find that it was gone already. Making her way to the bar, she ordered another and returned to Neji with it in hand, still sitting gracefully, though not without difficulty. Maybe she'd had more than she'd thought.

"Is that any good?" he asked her, eyeing her drink.

"Awful," she said. "Want a taste?"

She offered. He accepted and took a sip.

"It's not that bad," he said, as though saying something would make it true. "What's in it?"

"I have no idea," she confessed. "But it's very strong."

He looked her dead on and asked, "Is something wrong?" She must have looked startled at his comment, because he went on. "Every time I see you, you drink that fruity stuff."

"You don't see me much," she pointed out.

"I see you more than you realize," he said. Pause. "That sounded better in my head."

She laughed. He laughed. She liked this side of him. He must have been able to read minds, because he said, "So do I."

They were quiet for a few moments, each lost in their own thoughts, until Neji broke the silence. "I'm glad I ran into you here."

She smiled. "Company is always pleasant."

"No, no," he protested. "I'm glad _**you're**_ the company."

Her heart fluttered just a little bit. "Huh?" she said after a long pause.

"Everyone grew up while I wasn't looking," he explained with a look that suggested she should've known this without him saying it. "Just you and me, we got left behind."

"Tenten, right?" she said.

He nodded. "I got the invitation and I didn't quite know what to say. I hadn't even realized that she and Lee…" he started over. "I just always assumed that she'd be waiting for me, kind of like you're still pining for--"

She interrupted him quickly. "You know, I think she's already pregnant, too."

"With Lee? No. Lee would _**never**_…" he said.

"But he did," she said. "They have been for a few months now."

"Gossip," he said with a dismissive wave.

"I'm a medic, remember? _**Both**_ of them came to me in the same afternoon for advice on birth control."

"Well, if she's pregnant, it wasn't very good advice," he pointed out.

"It doesn't always work," she said sullenly. She shifted the topic. "Can you imagine what their children will look like?"

"I don't need to imagine. I _**know**_ that they'll all have big, bushy eyebrows and specialize in taijutsu."

She snorted at him before taking another sip of her drink. "I don't know," she said. "I think Tenten's delicate little eyebrows would overpower Lee's massive ones."

"Those aren't natural," Neji confided. "She plucks constantly. I think her eyebrows are even bushier than Lee's."

"No way," she said, half laughing already at the image of Tenten his words induced.

Mistaking her comment for genuine disbelief, he said, "Which one of us has been going on missions with her since we were twelve?"

And then the conversation really got going. Somehow, the topic shifted from the couple to recent missions to future plans (Neji was _finally_ taking steps towards Anbu) and finally settled on painfully nostalgic stories.

She found herself surprised by how much they shared in common; when he'd said that he saw her "more than she realized," he'd been right. Every stupid story she could think of, every crazy adventure, he'd been there. By the time four or six or ten empty glasses sat in front of her (every time she counted, she got a different number), she couldn't think of a time Neji _hadn't_ been around for one of the group's idiotic hijinxs.

"I must not notice you because you're always so quiet. Like a fish." Had she been sober, she might've winced at the slur that colored her tone.

"You're really drunk," Neji, who'd sobered up a bit, pointed out. "And I don't think fish are quiet."

"Fish are so fucking stealthy," she said, "that you don't even _associate_ them with stealth. You don't even catch them sneaking up on you until you're dead… and then it's too late!"

"I don't think fish would make ideal assassins," he said patiently. "For one thing, they can only breathe underwater."

"Lies!" she cried, banging her fist on the table.

"Fine," he said. "Fish are very stealthy. Satisfied?"

"As long as you're aware of the threat!"

"The fish threat."

"The fish _**menace**_. That's why we have to eat as many of them as possible! That's why they're my favorite food." Somehow, she'd twisted herself upside down backwards while she spoke, so now she looked at him from a very odd angle.

"Of course." He was smiling ever so faintly.

She grinned. As she looked at him, she remembered the way Tenten used to fawn over him so, the way the genius could do no wrong. Her smile faded slightly. He was cold and even cruel at times, but who needs a decent personality when one is among the most attractive things in Konoha? Tenten's opinion, not hers. She'd never really seen Neji before. He was always so quiet that she tended to forget his presence, and he'd just proven that it happened more often than not. How embarrassing. But from this angle, she could almost see what Tenten had been raving about. Hell, he almost looked just like…

Her stomach heaved. Immediately, she rocked to her feet. When Neji gave her a look, she groaned, "Bathroom!" He immediately stood and escorted her to the back, lending her his arm for support, and he held her hair for her while she paid her respects to the porcelain god.

She vaguely remembered looking up at him and saying, "Thank you," and then her mind drew a blank. Getting home, getting to bed, everything was a blur, though she thought she remembered phantom hands tucking her in tight…

Of course, that was more an impression than a memory.

* * *

**CY:** I've given the fish speech before, apparently... Naturally, I don't remember, but I've been told it was quite entertaining. This is going to be my longest fic yet so I can take my sweet time setting everything up, and hopefully it will turn out convincing. Please review, feedback helps keep me motivated!


	2. Two

**The Leftovers**

"_You know, they say that Rome wasn't built in a day."_

**II.**

Later, she would wonder if she'd still been drunk when she stumbled into the kitchen around noon, mechanically toasted and jellied a piece of bread, and started eating it while crouched under the table like a paranoid chipmunk. At the time, it had all made perfect sense, but after she dozed off against one of the legs and woke up in a queasy haze, the logic escaped her.

It wasn't until after this adventure that she remembered that she'd promised Naruto she'd be at his daughter's birthday, and—she checked the time—she was already quite late. She stared at her watch for a moment or two before this sunk in completely, and she sprung into action, trying to ignore the dull throbbing in her head and the lingering nausea.

There was definitely no time for a shower; too bad she was so filthy. She washed her face, changed her clothes, and brushed her hair quickly. A glimpse in the mirror told her that she looked decent—or at least, as decent as a woman with a hangover could. It would have to do. Sakura hoped she didn't smell too bad—a fresh layer of deodorant and a quick spray of perfume would have to suffice. She almost forgot her gift as she rushed out the door.

Half an hour later, a panting Sakura knocked on her friend's door. The short trip had been a harder one than she remembered. She was never drinking again.

It was Hinata who answered with a smile. "Sakura! There you are! We were starting to worry!"

Sakura tried her best to look pleasant. "Sorry I'm late," she said, and she held out her present like some kind of offering.

Hinata, graceful as always, took the gift with a smile. "Thank you. I'm sure Hikari will love it. Come in?"

Sakura followed her quietly, glad that the party was a quiet one. She didn't think she could handle noise right now. She should've stayed in bed. Sure, she'd promised Naruto she'd come, but a bowl of Ramen and all would be forgiven, and… when had the sun gotten so bright? She shielded her tender eyes.

Everyone was gathered outside, clustered in twos or three, for the most part chatting about polite, dull things. Sakura surveyed the yard with a frown.

She almost continued following Hinata, but she noticed that the other woman was making her way over to Tenten and wisely steered away. Both expecting themselves (Hinata was on her second child now), conversations recently had see-sawed between the best baby names and (her favorite), "Oh, Sakura, when are you going to have one of your own?"

She peered about the yard, looking for other prospects. Naruto, Sai, Lee, Gai, and Kakashi—good heaven, Kakashi had beaten her to the party—were talking about recent missions, which was normally the topic she would've chosen if not for the ever-enthusiastic combination of Lee and Gai. Not good for a hangover at all. Naruto noticed her and waved. Shikamaru and Temari were completely absorbed in one-another, like new couples were wont to do, while Ino shot them dark looks around her newest beau. Shino and Kiba seemed to be having a private discussion while watching the kids. Choji was busy with the cake.

Sakura found herself a seat near the edge of the yard, where she planted herself to watch the party. She wouldn't come to these stupid things if they weren't the only times she got to see her friends these days.

"You look bored."

She sat up, startled. She'd been drifting off. She was _never_ drinking again.

A shiver of delight passed through her for a moment, and then calmed quickly when she realized it was just her tired mind playing tricks on her. "Neji?"

It was him, most definitely. He looked as well groomed as ever, and she felt a little stab of jealousy. How was it that he managed to look so perfectly? He'd been drinking too, she'd seen it! He didn't look like he was hungover, either. Some people. Shizune never got hangovers, either.

All was forgiven, though, when he held out a glass of water to her. "Here."

She drank it greedily as he pulled up a chair, spilling a bit down her chin. Oops.

"How are you doing?" he asked, softly enough that it didn't upset her headache but not so softly she couldn't hear him.

"Either I have a hangover from hell," she told him frankly, "or possibly I am still a little bit drunk."

He nodded. "You smell like it, too."

"Oh, God," she groaned. "I'm going to be Aunt Haruno, the Alcoholic!"

"It happens to everyone," he told her blankly. "Honestly, after last night, I am surprised you came."

"I promised Naruto I'd come," she said cautiously, noting that he was being awfully friendly today.

Later, once she'd gotten to know him a bit better, she would realize that this friendliness was a result of his gratitude for someone in his same situation, among other things. Now, though, to her he was still the sadistic fellow who beat up his cousin all those years ago…

She couldn't remember much; what if she'd told him all her darkest secrets? What if she'd told him about that dream, the one with Ino? Or that time in Suna last spring, or…

"You okay?"

'_Act casual, Sakura. Casual.' _"Yes!" She stiffened as he took a sip of his water. He was acting normally, but she saw the way those pearly eyes of his peered at her over the glass, the way they flicked to Ino briefly as she dragged her boy over to Shikamaru and Temari, the way he looked down at his water with a guilty conscience when she tried to catch his gaze…

"It was only a dream!" she exclaimed. "I swear, I'm not really attracted to Ino like that, it just happened, but not really, and…"

He was looking at her oddly. Okay, she hadn't mentioned that last night. Thank goodness. She allowed herself to relax a hair and went to take a sip of her water, but the glass was already empty, and she ended up looking like an idiot.

"I think," he said, "you are still a little drunk."

She peered at her empty glass. "Me too."

He walked her home like a gentleman should, though he seemed to have lost his talkative edge from earlier. She didn't mind. She was feeling sick again. Plus when he was quiet, he was more like…

"Thank you," she said, fumbling with her lock.

He disappeared without a goodbye.

'_That's so like him,' _she told herself, but she knew she wasn't referring to Neji at all.

* * *

It was two nights later that she found herself staring at the ceiling, unable to sleep. It had been a long day at the hospital. It was always frustrating when everyone decided to go off and get injured simultaneously. Added to that, she'd drawn the short straw and been responsible for telling that man's wife she was a widow now…

She hadn't cried. She had been very, very quiet, completely still for a moment, and walked out of the hospital stiffly. It wouldn't have stood out to Sakura as much as it did if that particular ninja hadn't been so outspoken normally.

Such things happened every day. Death was a part of a ninja's life, and it was a part of a hospital, too. She saw a great deal of it. The thing that bothered her was that on some level, she had been jealous of that grieving woman. She had been jealous of her grief, of her powerful bond with her husband. Sakura wanted that, too. To have such a love… she would like to feel that sadness someday, if it meant that she'd found someone she loved so deeply.

Well, if she wasn't going to sleep…

It was twenty minutes later that she sat down at the bar and ordered her favorite strawberry drink. Making her way to an empty table uncertainly, she peered about the room, not sure what she was looking for until she saw Neji in the far corner, his back to the wall. She suspected he'd picked the seat so he could observe the entire room without using his Byakagun. This table would eventually become their regular meeting place.

"Hey," she said, sitting down.

He nodded at her, but didn't attempt to make further conversation. For a few moments, the two of them sat there in silence, sipping on their drinks. It wasn't an uncomfortable silence; it was a pleasant feeling—she had company, but she could also sit back and think. She didn't get to do that much. Naruto lacked the ability to be quiet, and… there were others with whom silences drew her attention to the inherent coldness of the company.

She had finished her drink, and she began to run her finger around the rim of the glass absently.

She wondered if something were wrong with her, that she had been jealous of that woman. Why would anyone desire such sorrow? Of course, she'd known for years now that she was a real masochist. She could remember days of absolute terror, that he was gone, that she hadn't seen him yet, that they hadn't spoken in a day. She could remember the fear that he wasn't just late, that he really wasn't coming. She could remember waking up from a nightmare that none of it was real.

The most beautiful days have the darkest shadows. For some reason, though, she couldn't seem to remember those, though there had been that ecstatic glee whenever he was at her side, whenever he said her name, whenever he praised her. It hadn't lasted, but it had been beautiful while it had, and he'd made that promise…

Another drink was set in front of her. Only now she noticed that Neji had gone and gotten them both seconds. She thanked him with a smile.

She examined him surreptitiously over her glass. He was nicer than she remembered. He was strong, he was handsome, intelligent. There had been rumors floating around, before Naruto and Hinata had gotten married (how they had convinced her family to go along with the union, she'd never know), that he and his cousin had been engaged. She'd thought it was weird, but apparently it wasn't so rare for families like his to inbreed, especially when a prodigy has been born in the "wrong" branch. She was glad that _that _marriage hadn't come to pass; he might have been blessed in some areas, but she couldn't imagine Hinata having to put up with _that_ personality. He was so cold…

But he wasn't, not really. He'd just bought her a drink!

'_Right, Sakura. That totally redeems him.'_

She liked his face when he was thinking, she decided. The way he had that distant look in his eyes, the way he occasionally focused on her… He kept looking as though he were about to speak, and then stopping himself. Could he have something to say to her? Probably about the disgraceful state she'd been in the other day.

It was when she'd finished her third drink that he finally opened his mouth. "The other day…" he began.

Inwardly, she cringed.

"…what were you saying about Ino?"

She shouldn't have come.

* * *

**CY: **Thank you so much for all the comments, guys! I'm really surprised there are so many people into Neji/Saku fics :D I'm also really glad you all liked the fish thing. For the person who asked how old she is: she's probably in her early or mid twenties. This is a little shorter than the last chapter, mostly because I was writing this instead of my essay (oops). Do you think my Neji is okay? I realized about halfway into this chapter that I have no idea how to write him so he's not totally OOC. I'm trying to make him like a friendlier version Sasuke. Expect an update around the end of next week, as I will then be done with finals.


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